What’s your favorite chord?
Hre’s my new phone greeting:
Imhof House of Corners! We’re having a special on tesseracts this week – get a free extra dimension with every order.
How does Harry Potter go down a hill?
He walks. jk. Rolling.
Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
Because the “p” is silent.
Here’s my new answering machine message:
Thank you for calling Imhof Long Pig BBQ, where our motto is “Soylent Green is just the beginning”.
Q: Why didn’t Karl Marx like Earl Grey?
A: Because all proper tea is theft.
I heard the Syfy channel is going to reboot Laura Ingall Wilder’s books, set on the moon.
The working title is “Little House on the Mare”.